The Story of Us (Part 3)

Hello wonderful people,

I hope this meets you all well. Once again from me to you all, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. As usual, the holidays were way too short but I’m grateful for the time away to chill with my people who matter the most to me. I went to a couple of weddings as well as my cousin’s 21st birthday party (which was such a swell time) and I’m looking forward to New Year’s day as it will be a good day for rest.

Now I know a lot of you have been waiting for today’s post and I do apologize for its tardiness but it’s for a good reason…..the man in question has lovingly agreed to put down some of his own thoughts on our story so you guys get to see things from his perspective. Here it goes:

This girl is a wahala girl. See as I enter one chance. Anyways, I’ve been following the blog same as all of you and my head has doubled in size as time has gone by (she always makes me look good). She has stayed true to what actually happened – it’s been like reliving the past. As I have been roped into this, I have no choice but to dive right in.

So we started seeing each other but we weren’t “official” just yet (I still don’t get the concept). And then one day she said she didn’t like me but that she would like us to remain friends. At that point, my ego wall went up and I told her that was impossible. I wasn’t going to be in the friend zone, I’m sorry. Sue me. I knew exactly what I wanted from her and I was not willing to settle for anything less. I decided I was going to move on with my life but it was very difficult at first. I didn’t sleep the night she told me. Alas, life had to go on. Just when I thought I was getting to a place where I could start to heal, I get a call from her. My pride almost stopped me calling back but I’m so glad I did. She told me why she said it and more importantly, why she had a change of heart and we got back together even though we weren’t dating (see what I mean by not getting the concept?)

And so we started to see each other again. It wasn’t always smooth but we have always managed to come back to each other. Relationships are hard work sometimes but you need to know why you’re in it to work through the tough times. We went into a relationship looking for a long term commitment that could lead to marriage so we always knew what we were fighting for. Along the way, she has managed to teach me and that is what I appreciate most about her. She has taught me what it means to love someone, to totally put your pride aside because it’s not just about you. She is strong because she allows herself to be vulnerable – if that’s not strength, I don’t know what is. 

We started talking about marriage a couple of months ago and decided that we wanted to get married so I had to get a ring. I got the ring in November but she was out of the country for a while after that so I couldn’t propose until she got back. On the 2nd of December, I finally popped the question.  And that’s how we got to where we are now. 

It’s been a fantastic time and God has been really great. This year has been fantastic for me and she is a big part of why that’s so. Thank you for reading. It’s been real.

That’s it people; you heard it from the other horse’s mouth. Like he said, all the glory belongs to God because we would not have gotten to where we are today if it wasn’t for Him leading and guiding us. We still have a bit of a journey ahead before we become man and wife. But as it’s been with our story so far, we will continue to look to God to show us the way to go.

And so from Grace’s Daughter (and her Prince), Merry Christmas and we wish you a wonderful 2015 ahead.

The Story of Us (Part 2)

This post was meant to go up on Sunday but I was having internet issues at home so I’ll just put up what I wrote then (never mind the two day lapse)

Hey guys,

I don’t know about you all but it’s been such a stressful week for me; I was hoping for a bit of downtime especially where work is concerned but it seems like there’s more to do than normal. I guess we haven’t yet gotten the holiday memo. I’m hoping things will be much better this Christmas week.

Speaking of which, Christmas is here again and with it comes the call to count our blessings and remember the things we have to be grateful for. Look guys, I won’t overlook the fact that it’s been a tough year, especially for those of us living in Nigeria. But the truth is that life itself is a reason to be grateful. So instead of focusing on what you don’t have and haven’t accomplished, focus on the fact that you are alive. As long as there is life, there is hope.

Alright guys, no need to keep you in suspense any longer. The story of us continues….Moyo and I had our first date at Ice Cream Factory in Lekki. If you had asked me at the time, I definitely would not have called it a date. Truthfully, I did not think much of it. As far as I was concerned, I was hanging out with a guy and I had no idea how things were going to play out. If anything, he started out with a serious disadvantage because he is Yoruba and I only wanted to date Igbo guys (bringing that up with my parents was not the easiest thing to do but that’s a story for another day). Our first time out was interesting because I had never talked so much about myself before. I was used to having to look for space to insert myself in my conversations with guys on dates but this was very different.

We hung out for two hours and we were just talking. It was very much a new experience for me and it definitely made him stand out. He was walking me back to my car when he asked me out again and I agreed. One thing I will say for sure ladies is that when a guy really wants you, he will make it clear; he will NOT play with your emotions and he will NOT keep you guessing. He will understand your value and what you are worth and he will do everything in his power to make you his. It IS that simple, please believe me.

We were talking for about a month when he told me he wanted us to be in a relationship. I told him that I needed time to think about it and pray about it and I did (need time that is). To be honest, I was struggling with letting go of the ideas I had of the kind of person I wanted to end up with. And I was not going to enter into a relationship with a guy if I didn’t think I could marry him.

It was not your typical romance story; boy meets girl, girl is ecstatic about meeting boy after going through a frog or two, boy and girl fall in love and live happily ever after. Nah, that’s not what happened here. God used Moyo to work on me, to make me a better person and help me realize that His plans for me might not always be what I would choose for myself and that can be very difficult to accept. But when you let go and allow God have His way, the path He carves out for you is infinitely more beautiful than you could ever have imagined for yourself. Amazing things happen when you let God write your love story.

Stay posted for the third (and final) part of the story coming your way next week.

Yours,

Grace’s Daughter.

The Story of Us (Part 1)

Hello wonderful people,

Hope y’all are doing well. I’ve been away for a while, I know and for that I apologize. I’m sure by now that you all are tired of hearing my apologies for my lengthy absences. Please bear with me guys…..I really am trying to keep up. I know I can try harder though and I so I ask you to please keep me in your prayers.

It’s been a very interesting couple of weeks; I was away for a couple of days in the U.S for thanksgiving. It was lovely to be able to get away and spend some quality time with my family. Coming back to Nigeria was a bit difficult because work got crazy. I’m hoping this next week will be lighter as we head into the Holidays.

Alright guys, so I have some news. A number of you who read this blog are friends of mine (some of you I have actually met through this blog) and so you know that I got engaged almost two weeks ago.

I’m sorry guys; I know I should have told you all sooner but I needed some time to wrap my brain around the whole thing. For those of you that have read this blog from the start, you know that my journey as far as dating is concerned has been a very long and interesting one. But one thing I can tell you for sure is that God is really awesome and cares so much about every single area of our lives especially where dating is concerned. If you hand over that aspect of your life to Him, He will take it and make it something absolutely beautiful.

I met Moyo about a year ago (on Boxing Day) at a hang out with a friend and I didn’t think much of him at the time. In fact, I’m quite sure he annoyed me because he kept asking me questions and challenging my opinions. It turns out that he was just very curious about me and how my mind worked. I didn’t know it at the time but a mutual friend of ours was trying to set us up. Fast-forward about two weeks later and I get a phone call from a number I don’t know and I call back. Turns out to be this same Moyo guy.

Ordinarily I would not have given him the time of day because he was not my type but God had allowed me to “have” my type just before I met Moyo and things didn’t work out with him. Looking back now I thank God for it because I would not have given Moyo and I a chance if I hadn’t gone through that experience. So the version of Grace’s Daughter that Moyo met was one that was a little heart-bruised but as a result, completely open to whatever it was God had in store for her as far as dating was concerned………

That’s it for today guys…..I’m gonna do a bit of a series on the story of Moyo and I as it’s a bit too long for one post. I will put another post up on Sunday. In the meantime, have a lovely week y’all and remember the reason for the season.

Love always,

Grace’s Daughter.

The Dignity of Labour

Hello Wonderful People,

Hope y’all are doing great. I know, I know, I’ve been away for too long. Trust me….I know. I can go on and on about how it’s been a crazy couple of weeks but the truth is that I haven’t been on top of my game as far as this blog is concerned and for that I apologize sincerely. I’m starting to find my feet in this new season of my life and I’ll do my best, with God’s grace, to continue to write as I am led.

I’m thinking the best route to go on this post is a bit of an update on my life so far and then I’ll hone in on a couple of things that I have learned in the past few weeks. I’ve started a new role at work (same office, different role) and it’s a pretty exciting one. It’s a lot of work but I’m learning so much and it’s a constant reassurance to me that God is directing my steps because getting the job was a testimony of it’s own. I have a really good boss who’s firm but fair and helps me to keep my standards high in terms of what I expect of myself. It was a bit of a struggle settling in but God continues to give me grace everyday.

My relationship with my mother has evolved in a number of ways and I think a lot of it has to do with my relationship with my boyfriend. My mother and I are closer than we’ve ever been and I have been able to appreciate her wisdom and grace. She said a couple of days ago that it seems my boyfriend has taught me to be less rude. I was about to defend myself when I realized she was actually right. I was not always patient with my mother but I thank God that He has given me the gift of wisdom to appreciate her while she’s still here because she won’t always be around.

I don’t know how much to say about my relationship with my boyfriend; I try to find the right balance between keeping my private life private but sharing enough so that it impacts someone else positively (at the end of the day it’s the reason why I keep writing. It’s so that someone can read it and be reassured that God is real, He loves us and He is very much interested in an intimate and honest relationship with us). We are doing well, thank God and we continue to discover ways to bring out the best in each other and push each other towards God. I don’t want to say too much for now (one day, I’ll share our story with you) but I will say this: It’s not always easy to do things God’s way but it is absolutely always right and when we honor God in every aspect of our lives (including our relationships with the opposite sex), He will honor us.

Now onto what’s on my mind to share today……I’ll try my best not to make it too long. One thing that has been a recurrent theme in the past couple of weeks is that anything that is beautiful and has any quality or good substance to it takes hard work. Creativity is a difficult thing to execute and also happens to be the easiest thing to appreciate. Think about a beautifully written song or a prose that resonates with the very core of your being. Best believe that a lot of work went into the development of it. I think of my current job as an analytst and how annoying it is for me to come up with a very good PowerPoint presentation. Anyone who does this on the regular knows that an insane amount of work can go into making them (especially if you’re still relatively untried in the art of preparing them). But a good presentation is easily understood and makes the audience believe that it was easy to create (which is very far from the truth).

The truth is whether you’re Beyoncé or an administrator, your job involves hard work that is will be tasking. It’s easy to look at other people and think our lives would be easier or better if we did what they do but the truth is that for anything good, there is a price to pay. And so instead of looking at other people and envying what they do (based on your “imaginings” of how “easy” you think their lives/jobs are), look to your hands and ask yourself what  God has placed in them. What gifts, talents and opportunities has He given you? You are who you are and where you are for a purpose and a reason. Your life is not by mistake. If you don’t know what your purpose is, ask Him and then trust Him to lead you every step of the way. If it seems hard, ask Him for the grace to do the work and He will give it to you. Just work with what He’s given you for therein lies your purpose and you can trust that God will honor the work of your hands.

“Do you see a man diligent and skillful in his business? He will stand before kings, he will not stand before obscure men.” – Proverbs 22:29.

That’s it from me people. I hope this blesses someone.

Love always,

Grace’s Daughter

 

 

The Danger of Comparisons

Hey guys,

Yes I know its been ages (head bowed down in shame). I have no excuses people, only a heartfelt apology. I can’t promise it won’t happen again (I’m learning to give my word only when I’m sure I can keep it). What I can tell you for sure is that as long as the Lord continues to give me a word, I will continue to share. I hope you all are doing great and that the Lord remains #1 where your life is concerned.

Before I go into what’s on my heart today, I have to say that the Convo was amazing. I wrote a post on it like two weeks ago that I was hoping to share with you but it’s been sitting in my flash drive cos the internet at home is….well let’s not get into that. I’ll put it up tonight when I get home (please hold me to it).

My life has taken a very interesting turn over the past couple of weeks. I’m now back in Nigeria and settled (and very happy to be home). I’ve also started a new role at work which is very interesting and is nothing short of a very special learning opportunity. I feel very fortunate and I’m doing my very best to focus on the work and glean as much as I possibly can so that I can be ready for the next level when that new opportunity comes. I read something today in Galatians that spoke to me in this regard:

” Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else” – Galatians 6:4

You see I’m very structured in my thinking and the unfortunate truth about life is that there is no such thing as a perfect one-size-fits-all structure. You have to figure out who you are and find something that works for you. I’ve had to learn this lesson over and over again because I compare myself to other people a lot. Please note that I didn’t say “used to compare” because this is something I struggle with to this very day. The problem with comparing yourself to other people is that it goes hand-in-hand with seeking human approval and it’s a perfectly terrible combination. My job is very important to me an so you can imagine how tempted I would be to compare myself to my peers at work. But like the passage above says, all I need to do is focus on my work and do it to the best of my ability. It’s all about taking one day at a time.

And it’s not just at work; even in the body of Christ. There are times when I compare my “devotion” to God with that of others which is extremely dangerous. What happens is that you get so focused on outward appearances that the state of your heart no longer matters to you anymore. I kid you not, there are times when the worship team is playing and I’m not really connecting. Then I look at my friend sitting a couple of seats away and her hands are lifted high and there’s such an intense level of concentration on her face. I automatically judge myself  and the thoughts that run through my head sound something like this “Come, are you sure you really love God? Have you been reading your bible enough and/or praying enough? I don’t think so because if you have, you would have connected in worship like your friend sitting over there”. Trust me, I know it’s silly but it’s what I go through sometimes. So I’m learning to take a step back and question my thoughts and motivations. Am I doing this in church (another good example is serving in church) because it’s something someone said I should do or am I doing it with a sincere heart and the right motivations?

When I started to write this morning, I wasn’t quite sure what I was going to share; that usually means that God wants to use this message to speak to someone’s specific situation. I don’t know who you are or what it is you’re going through but you need to stop using the systems, structures and standards of this world to grade yourself. You are from above and so your standards are heavenly. Don’t compare yourself to other people because the truth is that if you cannot be truly content with your own life, you will never be content with another’s. There will always be someone else who life is “better” than yours. Prayerfully seek out what your purpose on earth is and make sure to use the resources God has made available to you to fulfill them.

Have a blessed day people.

Peace and Love,

Grace’s Daughter

The Convo

Hello wonderful people,

So it’s three days left until The Convo holds and I’m really excited because I strongly feel it’ll be eye-opening and life-changing for many. I’m looking forward to learning new things and if the past few months have been any indication of how much I have to learn, then there’s a lot to look forward to.

I have a couple of things to say about tickets. First of all, I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who sent me an email telling me why they deserved a ticket. I was able to find reasons that merited a free ticket. The winners of the free tickets have been notified. Thanks again for participating and as per my email/message/tweet, you just have to give your full name at the entrance and you will be allowed in. I hope to see you guys after the event.

For those of you still interested in grabbing a ticket there is a discount available. Just visit http://www.afritickets.com and type in the discount code “twb” before you buy your ticket. Once again, tickets are only available online and only until Friday. Please see the flyer again for more details.

That’s pretty much it from me today guys. I got an immensely encouraging e-mail from a reader today. You know who you are and I just want to say that you ever so much. God definitely used you to speak to me and as long as He keeps giving me the words and the grace, I will keep writing.

Stay safe y’all and have a lovely weekend. Hopefully, the next time I write, I will be safe and sound back at home.

Love,

Grace’s Daughter

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Lessons Learned

Hey guys,

Trust y’all are doing great. I’m excited today for two reasons. The first is that my time in Dubai has almost come to an end. I am leaving soon and looking forward to going back home. The second is that The Convo is exactly a week away and I’m super hyped. I’m looking forward to meeting some of the readers of this blog and getting some new nuggets of wisdom where dating is concerned. Which brings me to the results of the trivia.

Now I got several complaints that my questions were ridiculously difficult which probably explains why I didn’t get much of a response from y’all. Now although I’m a little heartbroken (sob sob) because the response was kinda not good at all, I have decided to learn from it and move on. Next time, my trivia questions will be reader friendly…….lol. But I did give away two tickets to someone who really put in crazy effort to answer those questions (I admit, they were crazy hard). So dnddyon, you are the proud winner of two free tickets to The Convo. Please send me your full name and number as well as that of your guest. I look forward to meeting you next week.

That means I still have three free tickets to give away. Now because I really want to give these tickets away, I’ll make it easy on you guys. I’ve decided to let you tell me why I should give you a free ticket. The three most compelling answers I get will be winners of the last three tickets. So it’s all up to you guys. If you still want a free ticket to The Convo, send me an e-mail at aokwodu@yahoo.co.uk, telling me why you think you deserve a free ticket. Please send in your answers by Tuesday, 19th August at 12p.m (G.M.T + 1) and I will announce the winners later that same day. I look forward to reading your answers (please send them in this time guys, I’ve made things much easier ;)).

When I was thinking of what to share today, it came really quickly to me. Today’s post won’t be too long, just a summary of what I’ve learned over the past two months. I’m really grateful to God that He continues to open my eyes and heart to things He wants me learn. As time goes on, I’m growing and although that might make some of you want to say “duh”, the truth is that not everyone can say that. So I urge you to celebrate your growth. When you realize that you are not the same person you were some time ago, you ought to understand that it’s enough reason to be grateful to God.

So the lessons I’ve learned so far are summarized below:

  1. Own what you want. There are times in our lives when we want something because we think we should want it. We see that other people want those things and in order to not feel left out, we join the bandwagon and want those things as well. The truth is that the less travelled paths in life often have the greatest rewards. So if you know that your desires (aligned with Christ) differ from the desires of the masses don’t feel ashamed or left out. Understand that your calling is different, bask in it and own it.
  2. Make decisions based on purpose, not possibilities. Now I “stole” this from Tobi Atte. Check out his latest post on http://www.ijustmetme.com. A lot of the time, we find decision-making difficult because we try and decide based on ALL the available choices. For example, you want to buy a pair of shoes (now this is the kind of decision I love to make, being the shoe-lover that I am). The thing is it’s easy for me to decide what shoes I want to buy based on the criteria I have for buying new shoes. First of all, they must be high (unless I specifically want flats for work). Secondly, the color must not be one I already have in my cupboard. Thirdly, I must fall in love with those shoes the moment I lay eyes on them. If I feel “just okay” about those shoes, then I’m not buying them. This makes my life a whole lot easier when I’m buying shoes because I stick to my criteria. But a lot of us don’t even have criteria when we are trying to make decisions. And even if we do, our criteria are based on wrong ideologies and not on who we are, what works best for us and what God has called us to do. There’s so much to say on this so please check out Tobi’s post on why making decisions can be tough and how it can be made easier.
  3. Don’t judge people, not a single person. I learned this in a big way and it made me really understand that God wants every single one of us to extend love to every single one of us. And I mean EVERYONE!!!! I have learned not to judge anyone or think myself more spiritual than anyone because we are all on a journey. Loving every single person will help them on their way to finding God. I myself can be judged because there are areas of my life where I am not doing well. So when I look at someone that I think of myself as “better than” spiritually (I have no right whatsoever to do that), I remember that I’m supposed to see them as God does, the same way other people see me as God does.
  4. God ABSOLUTELY knows what He’s doing. I know this seems like a self-evident truth but sometimes it’s easy to forget when life throws curveballs your way. No matter what you’re going through right now, no matter how seemingly large or inconsequential, as long as you remain in God’s will you can trust in the truth that He is working something out for you, in you and/or through you. And one day, you will look back on those times and be grateful for the fruit that was produced. You can take that to the bank.

Kk that’s it from me today guys. I hope this speaks to someone. Please please send in your answers for a free ticket to the Convo. I really hope to see you all there. Have a blessed weekend guys and know that God is totally in love with you.

 

Peace and Love,

Grace’s Daughter.

Grace’s Daughter Trivia

Hey guys,

Hope everyone is doing great.

As promised, I have (for now) five free tickets to give away for “The Convo”. I’m looking forward to it and hoping that I can meet with you guys that read this blog and connect with you.

Just as a reminder, the event is on Saturday 23rd of August at Nike Art Museum & Gallery. The address is 2 Elegushi Road, Off Ikate Roundabout (3rd roundabout after Lekki Toll Gate). Time is 2.45 (sharp, no Naija time please, I dey beg una).

Alright guys, it’s trivia time. The first five people to answer these questions correctly will get free tickets to the Convo. Please send in your answers to aokwodu@yahoo.co.uk along with your name and phone number so I can reserve a ticket under your name if you’re a lucky winner. Good luck y’all.

1) How many posts are on Grace’s Daughter?

(A) 15 (B) 32 (C) 37 (D) 40 (E) 44

2) What is Grace’s Daughter’s favourite colour?

(A) Lavender (B) Coral (C) Neon Green (D) Burgundy (E) Turquoise

3) Which of the following is not one of Grace’s Daughter’s greater passions?

(A) Fashion (B) Reading  (C) Exercise (D) Writing (E) Singing

4) Which of the following cities has Grace’s Daughter not blogged about traveling to?

(A) Cape Town (B) Boston (C) Shanghai (D) Paris (E) Dubai

5) The most amount of time that Grace’s Daughter has gone without putting up a post is:

(A) 12 days (B) 3 weeks (C) 6 weeks D) 2 months (E) 3 months

6) In one post, Grace’s Daughter made a reference to two examples of people whose lives illustrate that the people God uses face intense trials. One was Paul and the other was:

(A) Noah (B) Abraham (C) Jesus (D) Joseph (E) Job

7) How many comments are there in total on http://www.gracesdaughter.com?

(A) 52 (B) 75 (C) 90 (C) 118 (D) 134 (D) 149

8)  The writer of Grace’s Daughter is currently in which of the following cities?

(A) New York (B) Dubai (C) London (D) Lagos (E) Singapore

9) What is the name of the host of The Convo

(A) Sola (B) Kiki (C) Abs (D) Tobi (E) Moyo

10) Grace’s Daughter has been viewed in all of the following countries except:

(A) Luxembourg  (B) Cape Verde (C) Brazil (D) Trinidad & Tobago (E) Scotland.

Phew!!!! That’s done thank goodness. Kk…..I’m really excited to see all your answers now so please send them in people. The deadline to get them is Monday the 11th of August. Time is 12pm (GMT + 1).

Thats it from me today guys. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Love,

Grace’s Daughter.

Dating Conversations (Part 1)

Hello wonderful world,

Hope y’all are doing great, I’m not doing too bad  myself. The past week has been pretty chilled; things at work are starting to pick up again as the holidays are over and I’m looking forward to going back home. The news in West Africa has been quite worrying with the Ebola breakout. So please be careful everyone; watch what you eat and where you go and carry your hand sanitizer with you. Better safe than sorry.

I’ve been struggling to figure out how to write today’s post. It’s been on my mind for a while and I’ve talked about it before in my previous posts. There’s an event called “The Convo” that I am privileged to be part sponsoring. I initially thought to tell you guys about it from a purely promotional angle: “Be there guys…it’s gonna be amazing….awesome this…fantastic that…blah blah” and there’s nothing wrong with that approach but it’s not consistent with who I am and what I do on this blog. So I’ll just tell you plain and simple how I used to carry a terrible dating philosophy and how exposing my mind to sound dating philosophy, consistent with Scripture, got me to where I am today. I’ll end with why I believe attending “The Convo” could help you with yours.

I remember when I was obsessed with romantic movies; I’ve watched the Notebook at least 70 times (and I’m not exaggerating). I was obsessed with falling in love and meeting a guy who would love me flaws and all. Now there’s nothing wrong with that at first glance but something about my whole approach was not working and I didn’t know why. I had heard things like “You have to be confident” and “Put yourself out there” and again there’s nothing wrong with that. But my mind was not right.

You see I was looking for a man to save me; to reassure me that I was beautiful enough for him and worthy of his love, to always be there for me when I’m down, to always tell me what I wanted to hear. Now if this is what you’re looking to get out of a relationship then I’m sorry, you are not ready to be in a good one. I’ll tell you why:

  1. No MAN can save you; JESUS already did that on the cross
  2. You cannot be a good mate for a man whose validation you seek (I’ll expand on this later)
  3. Sometimes what you want to hear is exactly opposite to what you need to hear.

The danger of my former dating philosophy was that I was opening myself up to attacks from wolves in sheep’s clothing. My former mindset meant that I was desperate to get into a relationship and guys can smell desperation a mile away. There were guys that I started talking to but I knew after a couple of interactions that they only wanted a quick lay and they figured I’d be easy because they thought I would do anything if they “validated” me by getting into a “relationship” with me. Quite frankly, it was only God’s grace (which I didn’t understand at the time) that kept me from being badly burnt.

Another problem was that not many good guys (and contrary to popular opinion, MANY of them exist) wants to be with the kind of girl that I was. They want women that know who they are and what they bring to the table. They want a woman that wants to be with them but doesn’t need to be. A woman who knows who she is is strong and can handle the truth; a needy desperate woman cannot handle the truth and will often tell a man what he wants to hear instead of what he needs to hear. Good men recognize the need for a strong partner who isn’t afraid to disagree with them and will still root for them.

The problem with seeking a man’s validation is that you’ll do just about anything to get it; even give pieces of yourself away. And often times, the kinds of men that ask for it are not good for you.

Now the next line of thought would be how I went from that girl to who I am today. Well I had to sit back and acknowledge that I was doing something wrong. Thankfully, it was during the period in my life when my relationship with God was developing so I started to investigate dating from His perspective. I read books on dating and womanhood by Michelle Hammond, Eric & Leslie Ludy and eventually Heather Lindsey. The thing I want you to note is that I sought knowledge on the matter.

When Tobi Atte approached me to sponsor The Convo, I checked him out as well as the videos of his events on Youtube and they not only resonated with me but I learned things that helped me at the time as I was still trying to decide whether to enter a relationship with my boyfriend. So when I recommend this event to you, it’s also because his words have (and continue to) bless me.

So that’s it people. The Convo is for mature people who realize that they don’t know it all where dating is concerned and are open to some real hard truths. I hope you guys make it and have attached the flyer below.

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I have some free tickets that I will be giving away in the next posts. Y’all will have to answer some Grace’s Daughter trivia so y’all better go do some revision. See you soon.

 

Grace’s Daughter

 

Grateful

Hey guys,

Trust you’re all doing great. I’m doing good myself and have some wonderful news to share with y’all.

So you know the exams that took over my life for the first half of this year (the legendary CFA), well I passed thank God. I honestly was not sure what to expect ’cause I left that exam hall trying to console myself, saying there was no harm in failing and I could always take it again in December.

But God showed up and took over so really and truly all the glory for this goes to Him and Him alone. He equipped me with the strategy to use while I was studying and gave me the grace and strength to put in the work. He gave me the ability to do my part and showed up when it was time for Him to do His.

My results have been out almost a week now and so the high of passing has tapered off a bit. We’ve had a week-long holiday in Dubai and so I’ve had some time to just relax and take everything in. In my assessment of the first half of the year, I talked about my gratitude to God for all the blessings He’s given me. It’s funny how not too long after, He’s given me another thing to put on my list of things to be grateful to Him for.

I had a conversation with my mum (who is quite simply one of the most amazing human beings ever) and she spoke to me about how amazed she is at how far I’ve come. She saw me at my lowest four years ago and so she’s one of the few people that can fully appreciate how far God has brought me. I guess what’s on my heart to say today is that it doesn’t matter where you are; how low you think you are or how far you think you’ve fallen. There is absolutely nothing that God cannot restore. You just have to give your life to Him (trust me, it’s easier than trying to figure it out on your own) and allow Him to have His way.

I wish you could have met me four years ago; my confused, bitter, resentful, mouthy self. You might read my posts and think I was always like this but that is so not the case. I was the bottom of the dung heap before God lifted me and placed my feet upon the rock. It was not an easy process; I had to let go of many things and there was a season where I had to be away from the people I loved so I could give God my full attention.

But it was soooo worth it. If I knew then that this was what He had in store for me, I would not have worried one bit. Now it’s easy for me to say that ’cause I have the benefit of hindsight, but there are still things I struggle with today like my career and where He wants me to be. However, by His grace, I can hold onto the things He’s done and have faith that He will always show up for me.

I don’t know who exactly this message is meant for today but I want to let you know that God loves you and has grand plans for your life; so huge that even if you sat down today and thought of the most amazing things that could happen to you, it could not compare to what God has in store for you (Ephesians 3:20). Let go of the past and hold onto God for your future. Set your face like flint and focus on the Father. He will take you places you never thought you could go.

Love,

Grace’s Daughter