About three and a half years ago, I started this blog. I was in a place where I had finally found the source of all wisdom and the answers to my most burning questions. The truth is that I had found the answers, but what I did not understand was that I had just set sail on a journey that was not going to end on this side of eternity.
I was super excited in the beginning…..I felt like I was sharing things with people that I wish someone had told me when I was younger. I was so relieved to no longer feel like the only person in the room that had not attended the class on how to live life. With every post and every comment came renewed zeal to keep charging forward.
But eventually I started to burn out. Writing became a chore; something I felt I had to because it was expected of me. In may ways, it mirrored my relationship with God – I would pray because I had to, and look at the clock to check how long I had spent. I would read my Bible because I had to, not because I was genuinely interested in what God wanted me to meditate on for the day. And I would judge my “performance” by the length of time spent in prayer or the number of chapters read. My attention had shifted from the heart of the work to the work itself and what it said about me as a “good Christian”.
This isn’t one of those posts where I end with how I made the right decision or did things better. It’s not one where the story ends “happily ever after”. I haven’t completely figured it out yet; it’s still work in progress. But what matters most is that progress is being made. Day after day, I’m doing my best, by the grace of God, to renew my mind and change the way I think. There were moments where I felt I needed to shut this whole operation down because I was a fraud, making people think that I had it all figured out when I was actually struggling.
But it was in that place that I received a new direction for this blog. The initial vision was for it to be a place where I could be honest and share this wonderful thing I had found which was my relationship with God. I now believe that the next step in that journey is to share more about myself, to be more honest about my struggles and where I am with them and to share my victories as well.
There are a number of ideas I’m thinking through on this but the first one is GD Chronicles, where I put up journal entries that I’ve made over the years. My hope is that it will encourage anyone struggling with similar issues.
I’ve also set out to be more active on social media – Grace’s Daughter is now on Instagram (gracesdaughter.ng) and twitter (@GracesDaughter1). You can also reach me via email on email@example.com.
So that’s to guys. Let the journey continue….Lord help me!!!